Parenting.

Parenting.

It's one of those things that I don't often feel like I get right.
And just when I'm starting to think I might have things figured out...my kid starts in on a totally new stage of their lives and everything I've learned about how to parent them up to that point CHANGES ALMOST COMPLETELY.
Like a game you're thrown into where the rules keep changing just when you think you've got them down,
and change depending on which player you are playing with,
and change depending on what colour their socks are that day.

I happen to think that parents and their kids are literally a match made in heaven.
It means that I firmly believe that we are in the families we are in for a reason. 
Well, probably LOTS of reasons, but youknowwhatImean.

It means that my kids are MY KIDS for a purpose.
Which means I need my babies and their specific strengths and challenges for my own learning and growth.
Which means that for some unknown reason, they need a mom that is passionate, but not precise; a little messy at life, honestly.
A mom that is kind of scatterbrained, but whole-hearted.
A mom that says what she's thinking and strives for honesty and authenticity, but is a little scared and sometimes gets overwhelmed and kind of freaks out and hides.
A mom that loves and loses her patience 
and apologizes 
and gets distracted
and should be softer and sweeter.
A LOT.

God knows (like, He actually does) why my kids need me.
They might need to learn from my strengths.
They probably need to learn from my mistakes.
They most likely need to learn to overcome the mess I make from blundering my way around this parenting thing.
They may need me to parent them just the way I would naturally parent.
And we may both need the growth that comes from my struggle to parent them in a way that is counterintuitive to me,
but ideal for them.

We need each other... for obvious reasons, and ones that will be hidden until further notice.
There is a plan that we are a part of, together, that is bigger than either of us. We are in the middle of a giant lesson, a giant test, a giant opportunity for JOY.
The mistakes, triumphs, and messes we make together as parent and child are special,
they have purpose,
and they are sacred.

And as a general rule, I believe that about every parent-child relationship.
Which means that I don't get to jump to any conclusions about someone else's mommy-kid relationship.
It means that maybe they need a parent that is NOT the parent I would be...
but if they needed me as a parent, then they would be my kid. And they're not. So....
Maybe they need that parent's example, mistakes, strengths, and weaknesses to give them the opportunities, the refiner's fires, the learning and the growth that will allow them to become something really amazing; the person God knows they can be.

I have to trust that.
And remind myself of that.
And simply be a parent that lets other parents parent the way they believe is best. And always be the parent that supports other parents-trying-their-best with love and respect. And with hugs.

Because it's hard.
Even harder when you're not perfect.
And so all you can do is keep on learning from your mistakes,
treasuring the moments that are sheer heaven,
keep recognizing Who has the Big Plan,
and trusting His perfect, perfect judgement.
Because He is the perfect parent, after all.

Heaven, help me.