To Daycare or Not to Daycare...

...That was the question.

And I mean me starting a daycare, to clarify.

It's one of the plethora of options that always seem to come up as a way of bringing in more income to this penniless little student family of ours. (As a rather random side note: I'm SOooo grateful for so many fantastic friends in the same boat. The poor-student boat is actually kind of a lot of fun when you've got lots of great company.)

So anyways.
I worked in childcare part-time the whole time I was working on my degree. And I got my degree in Elementary Education. Caring for and teaching children has just always been on the menu of my life.

I babysat the Toddler for a while, which worked out fine. And so, D-Hubby and I have often discussed whether or not we could have me take on a few kids at a time on a regular basis. Seemed like a good idea, sometimes. Other times, not so much. Mostly, not-so-much...but I waffled lots.

And so. Once and for all, I wanted to know whether it would be worth it. So I contacted a friend who had run a daycare from her home for 3.5 years, and we had it out. I wanted the nitty gritty honesty...and I got it.

*Disclaimer: I'm sharing this experience, and her experiences, because of the impact it's had on my perspective of motherhood...not as a formal review of having a daycare, or anything else. It's just her experience. So just take it for what it's meant for, aright?? Okee, dokee. Moving on...*

She started off the conversation, right off the bat, with saying that she would not recommend it to anyone. I was surprised that she was so adamant and firm about it from the beginning, but her explanation of her experience helped me understand.
She had a lot of really young kids to take care of. And for a while it was fine. But then it was overwhelming. She found it next-to-impossible to go on vacation or take breaks. Or even going anywhere, day-today, with that many kids, period. And then, it made it hard for her to even want to be with her own kids after everyone else's were gone: kid overload for her. She had small kids at the time, and she felt that she missed out on some of those tender little years with them, that she didn't get to enjoy them like she wished she could have. She made sure to state that it was probably just her, that other people probably had way more patience and stamina then she did. But even now, she has a hard time babysitting friends' kids because she was just so burnt out from the experience.
What did it for her as far as the time to quit, was having another lady from out of town stay at her house overnight during a youth conference. This lady had a day-care-home-thingy for 10 years. Out-of-Town Lady said that from her own experience, she felt she had missed out on vital teaching opportunities with her kids, spiritually and otherwise...and was now starting to see the effects as her kids struggled in school, struggled spiritually, and struggled knowing who they were. Out-of-Town Lady's heart was broken for all the missed moments where she could have been there to strengthen them while they were little. It was the breaking point for my Helpful Friend; it helped her make a final decision, and she got out of the daycare biz pronto.
On the flip side, she said that it was very beneficial financially. Helped make things comfortable...but that even that wasn't really worth it, in her opinion. Get into cheap housing, and cut your expenses instead...and then just enjoy your kids while you can was the summary of her advice to me.

I was grateful for the perspective that she added to the whole question...not because it gave me a great excuse to not do it, (ha) but because it reminded me of the importance of just being there for...and enjoying my kids, as their Mom...the only one they've got. And during the only childhood they get.

And as Baby-Rae keeps growing up faster and faster, I realize that it goes by so SO quickly. Finances will work out, so long as we've got faith and self-control...and two car seats actually do fit fine in the back seat of an M&M-sized hatchback for a while. And when I look back at this time in our lives, I want to smile about packing ourselves into a teensy blue car, with the kiddos in the back seat, while we head out with our tuna sandwiches to meet Dad at the school for lunch so he doesn't have to buy one. Or all squish in for a drive to The Land of the Extended Family to visit Grandmas and Grandpas...the way we'll spend most family vacations for a while (sorry, Disneyland, you'll have to wait). I want to laugh at the cheap fun we had with Baby-Rae washing dishes in her "little sink" beside me (read: taking measuring cups and pouring water ALL over her, the counter, and the floor) and remember the moments we just looked out the window together while she pointed at things she saw, and got excited about seeing dogs walking past. And I want to remember how, after discovering that people have belly buttons, she always wants to lift up her shirt....and MINE....to find the buttons...and is absolutely delighted when she finds my very prominently displayed bellybutton on a very big belly.

So no day-care-home-thingy in our near future. And I'm okay with that.

Because it can wait.

In the meantime, I'll just love me my awesome morning paper route, the way I am currently saving up towards some new post-maternity clothes when the time comes.
And a new car. Saving verrrrrry slowly.